Reality of Seniors Living Alone: Context, Challenges and Future Trends

EMPTY NEST SYNDROME

As the household size decreases in Singapore, the first thing that comes to mind is the phase of the family life cycle that follows as young adults leave their parental home, leaving an empty nest. As children grow up and leave the family home to pursue their independent lives, parents may find themselves grappling with the empty nest syndrome, experiencing a range of emotions such as sadness, loneliness, and a sense of loss⁶. It is especially difficult for parents who have dedicated their livelihood towards raising their children. Subsequently, when child rearing is no longer the focus of the parents’ lives, they may get a sense of loss when greeted by an empty house every day⁷ .

This is especially important to understand in Singapore’s context, as due to stronger family ties in Asia – compared to western families – there is the societal expectation that children should look after their parents, contributing to a sense of dependency on seniors⁸.

p>p>”I’ve always cared about my family. Why is it that when I am older, no one seems to care about my matters?”p>Mdm Khadija, 83 (not her real name)

Mdm Khadija (not her real name), a participant of a research study by CARE, is 83 years old, and experiences loneliness as a divorcee living in an empty nest. According to a report by CNA, she moved to a rental flat after her son sold their house and moved to Johor Bahru. He hardly ever visits or calls her⁹. As a result, Mdm Khadija is left alone, with only her grandson – who is also rarely home – and no one to confide in. Given the prevalence of empty nest syndrome among elderly women, who typically shoulder more caregiving responsibilities than men¹⁰, there exists an expectation for their children to be there to support them emotionally and physically as they transition into their senior years. Empty nest marks a significant milestone in the ageing process for parents, and this may exacerbate feelings of isolation and adjustment to living alone. Consequently, there are reports of seniors experiencing symptoms of depression, behavioural symptoms (e.g., changes in sleep pattern, changes in appetite, loss of motivation, etc.) and cognitive impairment¹¹. While an empty nest is a natural part of the parenting life cycle, it can be challenging for individuals to navigate without adequate support and coping mechanisms.

COMPANIONSHIP AND SUPPORT

Seniors who are single, widowed, or have no children often find themselves facing unique challenges in their later years, assuming that they have no other family members who are still alive. The nature of human beings is that we often yearn for closeness and affinity, especially when we observe and envy others with families. In return, it will most often trigger loneliness in us¹². Admitting loneliness is uncomfortable for many seniors in Singapore, which may result in seniors avoiding social participation due to low motivation¹³. However, there are some, who are open about their loneliness:

p>p>“I was born lonely with no siblings, and I will stay lonely and die lonely.”p>Mr Sarmugam

Mr Sarmugam is a divorcee with no family and is relying on the Silver Support Scheme for sustenance¹⁴. He dives into a pool of loneliness as his physical health slowly steals his mobility, resulting in him not being able to venture beyond his estate area as he needs his wheelchair to get around. Similarly, going back to Mdm Khadija, she grew up as an orphan and never went to school like others. As such, she has always felt isolated from the society. Subsequently, it contributed to her yearning for social interaction; however, it is difficult for her to reach out for support due to the lack of intrinsic motivation and physical health that limits her mobility¹⁵.

Apart from issues like social isolation and loneliness due to the lack of daily companionship and support – which in social construct, usually comes from living with a partner or family members – they also face financial struggles¹⁶. Seniors of low socio-economic status (SES) who live alone tend to face this problem as they are solely responsible for managing their own household expenses and retirement savings¹⁷. In a study done by Wee et al. in 2019, it is apparent that seniors who are of low SES (which is attributed to lower household income, poorer perceived physical environment, poorer functional status and more) are more prone to feeling lonely¹⁸. On the other side of the spectrum, despite these challenges, there are seniors living alone in Singapore who value their independence and autonomy, cherishing the freedom to live life on their own terms¹⁹. Nevertheless, it is crucial for communities and support networks to recognise the unique needs of seniors living alone and provide resources and services to help them maintain their well-being and quality of life as they age. Acknowledging that not all seniors living alone are experiencing loneliness, there are studies who found that social interaction moderates causes of loneliness²⁰. It is significant for Singapore to consider seniors’ limitations to seeking out social interaction and support. Not to mention, to see what programmes are working and what are the gaps in meeting the needs of seniors living alone.

THE “MANY HELPING HANDS” APPROACH

For seniors who are living alone and are unemployed, what can they do to combat loneliness and sadness? As pointed out by the World Health Organization (WHO), active ageing is important in optimising opportunities for health, participation, and security in order to ameliorate the quality of life of seniors. Evidently, these three pillars are also reflected in Singapore’s Successful Ageing Framework in 2006 where it is delivered across four strategic thrusts²¹:

1. Enhance employability and financial security;
2. Provide holistic, affordable healthcare and eldercare;
3. Enable ageing-in-place and;
4. Promote active ageing

Ultimately, the Many Helping Hands approach stresses the involvement of not only one, but multiple stakeholders to achieve successful ageing. Stakeholders would also include non-state actors like individuals, voluntary welfare organisations, charities, and communities²². Accordingly, whilst there are many organisations and initiatives that encourage social participation for the elderly population, Participate in Design (P!D) is an organisation that has a unique approach to participation. Essentially, the organisation utilises participatory design approach in order to bring the elderly together, make connections and bonds, and uses their inputs and talents into creating a change. One notable project is the Fajar Spring Community Kitchen. As part of an initiative by the National Council of Social Services (NCSS), P!D assisted in bringing senior participants together in prototyping a community kitchen for the senior citizens in the neighbourhood²³. This is where the seniors are able to give their input into decision-making, whilst also creating bonds with other peers. P!D advocates participatory design as a way to involve multiple stakeholders in creating a sustainable and effective initiative, enhancing the sense of belonging towards the community²⁴. Distinctively, this is a unique way for organisations to encourage social cohesiveness within the elderly community, hence, increasing their social participation in voluntary work, community activities and lifelong learning.

The reality of seniors living alone encompasses a complex array of challenges and considerations that demand our attention. Recognising the dual responsibility shared by both the community and the government in providing care services and developing programmes for seniors living alone, it becomes paramount for Singaporeans to grasp the reality of this demographic. This understanding is essential to not only safeguarding the well-being of seniors, but also for guiding policy formulation and community engagement. While traditionally, family has been seen as the primary source of care, it is vital for us to acknowledge that this is not always the case; particularly in Singapore’s diverse society. Seniors may find themselves living alone due to various factors beyond an empty nest. Looking into the future, with the impending silver tsunami, Singapore must redouble efforts to prioritise the unique needs of its elder population, fostering a culture that cherishes and supports seniors in maintaining independence throughout their later years.

Qamar Jannah Fateen is currently a Research Analyst at the Centre for Research on Islamic and Malay Affairs (RIMA). She holds a master's degree in international development practice, specialising in sustainable economy. Her current research interest includes social inequality, cultural development and diaspora of Austronesians/Malays.